Biden Vows Running Mate To Be “Real classy broad”

"The next Vice President will be cute as a button" - Joe Biden
Joe Biden tracing an hourglass figure with his hands.

Democratic presidential nominee Joe Biden vowed in an interview on Monday that his running mate will be a “real classy broad,” presumably eliminating Elizabeth Warren, Kamala Harris and especially Stacey Abrams from consideration.

“She’ll be smart as a whip, committed to improving Obamacare, and have a full set of curves,” added Biden, tracing an hourglass shape with his hands.

Highlighting his commitment to gender equality, Biden emphasized that under no circumstances would he tap a male running mate, no matter how well-qualified.

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